Every quarter or so, we provide readers with a ranking of the referees in the English Premiership in our Bum Ref Index.
Loosely based on the Economists 'Big Mac Index', which utilises the economic fallacy of purchasing power parity (PPP) to compare the prices of rotting-and-compacted-animal-remains-placed-in-a-bun in different countries, in order to estimate currency differentials.
We are interested in referees rather than currencies.
###############################################################################
Last year, we determined our Index using a complex mixture of the fundamental parameters that we assess in our analysis of the match officials.
Some of these factors are not for mentioning in this place, but others include the psychological profiling of match officials, racist decision making, club bias etc.
For 2008/09, we are changing the measurement, both to simplify it, and to link the Index more thoroughly with this blog.
To explain.
Each referee receives two totals for each match. These totals are then added together.
The first of these totals relates to the number of match altering decisions that the referee makes during the game, together with a weighting related to how correct the decision is seen to be with the benefit of slow motion replay.
The second total relates to the number of points that are lost/gained by the decision.
So a poor penalty at 4-0 with three minutes to go is markedly less significant than a penalty and a sending off after 14 minutes, particularly when both decisions were, in fact, incorrect.
The holistic reasoning behind this new mode of measurement of the Index is this - the higher the rating as measured above should correlate with one of two things.
Either the referee is useless and should be demoted.
Or the referee is potentially corrupted and should be demoted.
The PGMOB has 20 referees on their roster. They only wished for 18 but they had to reinstate a couple of refs after appeals.
Two refs have not been seen.
Mark Clattenbung because is banned and Uriah Rennie because he is Black.
An aside - isn't it noticeable how, the higher one moves up the English football pyramid, the less Black faces one sees...
Just a point.
I mean.
1 Black referee.
Not one game yet.
So, here's the Bum Ref Index (prior to this evening's eagerly awaited [sic] match).
1. Attwell 4.00
2. Styles 3.00
3. #############
4. #############
5. Jones 2.67
5. #############
7. #############
8. #############
9. #############
10. #############
11. #############
12. #############
13. #############
14. #############
14. #############
16. #############
16. #############
18. Foy 0.71
There are some interesting points to be made here.
Last year, the worst two officials were Mark Clattenbung and Howard Webb.
Clattenbung is currently banned for alleged inappropriate off-field fraud shenanigans ################################################ while Howard Webb remains The Chosen One as he is given a very privileged status within the English game.
After last year's appalling standard of his officiating, Webb had a nightmare of a Euro 2008, when he was sent home early for the ludicrous penalty he gave to Austria against Poland.
So the second worst official in our Bum Ref Index 2007/08 also had a 'mare in Austria/Switzerland.
One might think that, in a remotely meritocratic environment, Mr Webb might have been given a lower profile for the new season.
Far from it.
Check out Webb's roster to date this season:
Round 1:
Ars v WBA (Sky Live) Referee
Round 2:
MC v WHU (Sky Live) Referee
BR v HC 4th Official
Round 3:
Ch v TH (Sky Live) Referee
Ars v NU (Setanta Live) 4th Official
Round 4:
Liv v MU (Sky Live) Referee
Round 5:
Sun v Mid (Sky Live) Referee
HC v Ev 4th Official
Round 6:
WgA v MC (Sky Live) 4th Official
Round 7:
Ev v NU (Sky Live) Referee
Round 8:
BW v BR Referee
Round 9:
Ch v Liv (Sky Live) Referee
WBA v HC 4th Official
Round 10:
Ful v WgA Referee
Round 11:
NU v AV (Setanta Live) 4th Official.
So PC Webb has had 15 appointments despite his professional incompetence.
10 of these matches have been Sky/Setanta live events.
Uriah Rennie has not had one appointment.
In second place on the demotion list is Rob Styles - we have shown in recent posts how Uncle Keith of the PGMOB allows him to officiate to whatever level of unprofessionalism, with reward rather than punishment being the reaction.
The other valid figures to point out are those relating to the two newest officials on the PGMOB Select Group roster - Attwell and Jones.
Stuart Attwell is currently the worst referee in the Premiership...
##################################################################
##################################################
He has been fast-tracked too soon and he should be immediately demoted to more suitable levels - say, the Unibond Northern.
Aside from his Premiership officiating, the man has wreaked his havoc elsewhere.
Remember the goal that never was at Vicarage Road?
That was one of Attwell's.
Yesterday, the new Poll surpassed himself in his total ruination of the Derby v Forest match.
I won't bother going through all the incorrect decisions - google 'attwell', 'shite' and 'referee' for the details - but his performance was amateurish.
Paul Jewell commented post-match: "His sending-off was harsh, some of his bookings were harsh, I'm not sure it's a penalty, then why he doesn't give the goal I don't know," blasted Jewell. "He gave the most unbelievable decision at Watford. He's 25, he's meant to be the next best thing since sliced bread, then he's taken out of the Premier League and he's given a game of this magnitude. It beggars belief."
Not at Planet Hackett in ScudamoreWorld it doesn't...
It is difficult not to come to the conclusion #################################
#######################################################################
########################################################################
As the most incompetent are the most rewarded, we are only able to conclude that, due to his non-selection, Uriah Rennie is, in reality, the best Premiership referee.
We have always told you ScudamoreWorld was warped.
Unfortunately, the blocked out parts of the posts and all posts labelled # are available in full to subscribers only.
Our roster is now full for both Football Is Fixed and Dietrological.
But, please enjoy the free snippets that we are posting on this site.
© Football Is Fixed/Dietrological
