************FOOTBALL IS FIXED IS DAILY FOR OCTOBER************
The whole pretence of the English Premiership Illusion fractured in an astonishing display of professional incompetence by the match officials of the Professional Game Match Officials Board (PGMOB) last weekend.
The really high profile errors have been itemised in the press throughout the week - Rob Styles apologising for the fake penalty that he gave a labouring Manchester United against Bolton, no comment from Mike Riley who changed his mind from booking to sending off Cahill, nor from Steve Bennett who gave Wigan a ludicrous penalty against Manchester City.
But this was merely the tip of an iceberg of #####################.
Furthermore, the average fan has no idea about the machinations that are taking place behind the scenes to determine the hyperreality that they are seeing on the pitch.
For example, there was a colossal global gamble against Man City on the day of the match and ############################################################
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And, although Rob Styles was correct in coming clean, the way that this admission has been reported in the press is comical. For example, the only item of English sports news on Murdoch's Fox News was a focus on Mr Styles, a Man of Integrity. It is as though one admission of personal guilt removes all other instances of communal guilt, in a peculiarly networked catholic style.
There were a range of different reasons for the refereeing incompetence but that doesn't validate it.
Eight matches in the Premiership roster had their outcome altered through the inappropriate input of officialdom, which is a bit grim if you're paying to watch this stuff.
As Gareth Southgate stated after 'Boro were mugged repeatedly by Chris Foy against West Brom: "We can't rely on the officials to give us things at the moment."
Or, as Gary Megson said, prior to the apology of Patio Man, for Styles refused to explain his decision immediately after the game: "I know what I'd like to say but that is not what I am allowed to say."
It is all to do with the Respect agenda.
But Respect isn't something that may be branded and marketed, particularly when introduced in such a uni-directional manner.
Where was the Respect shown to Everton fans, players and officials by Mike Riley, or Bolton by Rob Styles, or 'Boro by Chris Foy, or Man City by Steve Bennett...?
And just to show that Keith Hackett and the PGMOB do not reciprocate on Respect, lets take the case of Mr Fast Track, Stuart Attwell. After the youngest PGMOB ref had made a Pollesque howler in awarding a fictitious goal at Vicarage Road last week (its fictitious sendings offs and penalties that you can get away with, not goals, Stuart), we were informed that he would be stood down for a while.
Imagine the general surprise then, when Attwell was announced as 4th Official for the 'Boro versus West Brom game, having undertaken similar duties at the televised West Brom v Villa derby just one day after the hypergoal at Watford.
Perhaps, it was him screaming over the microphone that distracted Mr Foy.
And, perhaps it was Howard Webb, the 4th Official at Wigan, who gave the fake pen - he has got form in this department after all.
But, we will never know.
For, not only are the manipulators of football unwilling to allow video replays as utilised in other sports, they are also unwilling to allow us to hear what the officials are saying to each other during the match.
Once again, compare and contrast with the significantly more legal sport of rugby.
In response to Attwell's incredibly short recuperation, one league referee commented: "Oh, good God! Who's that 4th Official at Middlebrough?"
Even more outrageously, Attwell was selected as the 4th Official for Martin Atkinson in the heavily fiddled Champions League match in Minsk last night.
Respect...
And, these manipulations and contortions matter beyond the spectator perspective.
Bettors are duped into pre-arranged losses.
Jobs are lost due to fake results, players are dropped, club ownership might even change if the results on the pitch produce the wrong hyperreality.
In the longer term, transfer market evaluations are warped and title races randomised or corrupted.
The people who wish to either manipulate or randomise the match outcomes are fighting tooth and nail to avoid the introduction of video replays, as such technology will significantly lessen the grip of the murky operators.
Nothing is Real.
Everything is Hyperreal.
The New Hyperreal is built on the Old Hyperreal, repeatedly, until the New Hyperreality bears no resemblance to the Hyperreality that the Illusion was originally based on.
And, bearing that in mind, here is the Premiership League Table as it should appear this morning, if one were to correct the fake outcomes for the negative influences of the ############################################################
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Early in the season, these evaluations are particularly valuable from an analytical perspective, as the information is not yet 'in the price', so to speak.
To take account of this, only Dietrological Professional subscribers will have access to the full table. ##################################################
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In ScudamoreWorld, ELEVEN teams are 4 or more places away from their Real league position, and THREE teams are 8 or more places away from Reality. One team that stands in the top half of the ScudamoreWorld theme park should actually sit in 18th place, in one of the relegation positions.
And this brings to light the final problem with no video replays in ScudamoreWorld.
The manipulators are always willing to put on the Randomiser Hat and claim that 'luck' (as they endearingly call corruption) evens out over the season.
Data from the last two seasons as well as from the current campaign to date shows that this most certainly isn't the case.
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But, then every so often, you see someone get their comeuppance, and a smile is brought to the face of even the most hardened cynic.
As I am finishing writing this post, I am watching the increasingly desperate attempts by Howard Webb to stop Barcelona from winning in Donetsk.
He has used the standard strategy that the PGMOB utilise when Arsenal are dispatched to some grim northern outpost in order to get a good kicking from the locals - allow unconditional abuse of the superior side with no protection.
The average number of fouls in Champions League games is #### per side.
Donetsk have produced 30 fouls in the game, yet until the Second Half, the trigger happy policeman had only booked Xavi for one of Barca's three fouls in the first period.
Add to this the denial of a clear late penalty (with associated booking for objecting to #################), and our office ecstasy at Messi's winner was most certainly not matched by ######################################!
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The skill of Messi is greater than any ######################################.
Messi Mashes The Manipulation.
We finish with some comments by The Daily Telegraph's Brian Moore: "Most other sports have tried to help their officials and, where possible, have introduced television match officials and reviews to get right as many important decisions as possible... The solution is obvious to all outside football and many within. Video replays by a fourth official. Why Fifa are so obdurate in this regard is mystifying. Their proposal to have two further referees, one for each penalty area, will compound the problem of human error. Moreover, the time spent in consultation between referee, his ‘area official’ and his assistant, will equal or exceed that taken by video analysis."
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