A Selection of Script Originally Published on April 27th / 28th 2024 for For Green Fields clients
The Twilight Zone
At some point in the last seven days, our Universe split on a quantum level into two parallel Universes (as it does all the time in a self-replicating self-similarity sort of way.
There was the original Universe that I thought I was fully immersed in where Ashley Young gave away three penalties and the newspapers were awash with scandal and Attwell & Taylor were both stood down and the game replayed.
And there is the Universe I now evidently inhabit where the match between Everton and Forest hovers in a Twilight Zone - it actually occurred but nobody actually talks about it.
It is an unevent.
Anyway.
In this new Universe everything is just fantastic and Liverpool implode and the Enhanced Games is actually the Premier League.
And nobody cares.
In this Universe you get 4-3 results to order (in Orwellian terms, the 4-3 outcome releases the most pleasure to the masses and is pleasing).
The Multiverse might be the solution to the issue of PGMOL authenticity - as Stockley Park desperately seeks some footage that can be used, the stadium could display - VAR - Looking at a Foul in Parallel Universe 29454-31C from the 37th minute of some game.
And everybody can groan and applaud and, most importantly, bet.
The carcinogenic asset stripping of football continues apace.
Hooper and Bankes aren't exactly the most equitable PGMOL selections.
If Forest score, the EPL should release the lions or the chariots or something.
That would be good.
That would shake off this melancholic inertia as you watch your sport sink and sink and sink...
West Ham v Liverpool
Despite what some might sy, it is never (or very very rarely) sensible strategy to announce senior retirements ahead of time. MBA courses from Wharton to Warwick know this to be true but football managers would seem not to.
From Sir Alex to Klopp to Xavi, it doesn't work - the latter's reappointment in the week following a humiliating Champions League exit and a feeble surrender of the title to Hala Madrid was particularly interesting as Xavi is most certainly proof that great players don't necessarily make great managers. Or even adequate managers...
So Slot Machine is arriving and fingers are pointing Klopp towards various doors with 'EXIT' written above them - some of them are in flashing red neon to emphasise the point.
Klopp might as well go on gardening leave now.
Which is a shame because, even though his team were never as good as the PGMOL made them appear and many business practices from Fenway Sports Group were of questionable legitimacy, Klopp was good for Liverpool.
He sided with the fan, the city and their causes.
Good job he's chosen to go really as he is exactly the sort of person that organised crime is trying to remove from the English game.
The markets have collapsed to flux on this event just prior to team announcements.
There's probably value somewhere so we have an hour to find it.
Some Splendid Affairs
In the very old days it wasn't feasible to trade on teams with nothing to play for whether their opponents had anything to play for or not.
Then a few smart people realised that you could get a great price on teams with nothing to play for (particularly against teams with something to play for) and rogue inputs lubricated the corridors of corruptions - suitcases of cash in Spain &UK, doping, insider trading, referee liaison if possible, cartelised agent inputs, all the usual stuff.
Then it became obvious that all we had here was a new corruption template - the corrupting outsider handicapping their opponents. And that database swelled to ludicrous proportions before the market makers learned to accommodate such inputs in the price.
Hidden inputs remain valid to this day but the number of events able to be solved is reduced from former heights particularly in periods where we currently inhabit where anti-corruption disclosures are seriously impacting upon the markets.
Football is Fixed is quantum entangled with the betting markets too.
Of the 15:00 games, two (MU v Burn and NU v ShU) are insider nonsenses only able to be traded if you can trace the insider trading.
Nothing else matters.
Fulham v Palace, even though we have waited late, is still not revealing her answers - with time running out...
Wolves v Luton is inflated because of the things that never happened during the football match that never happened when Ashley Young, who has never happened, did some things that also never happened.
Luton looked such a sweet quiet corruption once upon a time.
And now look at the state of it...
Everton v Brentford
Sometimes one perceives market structures that are just a touch too orchestrated, almost as if pre-arranged regardless of volume traded.
This is exciting when it happens.
It means we have a blitz chess event between two insider trading teams.
Somebody should prepare the paper on the game theorisation of the options open to individuals who, by chance, own a bookmaker and a football club (or significant parts thereof e.g. shares or debt, that sort of thing).
So, not legitimate but very postmodern.
The Final Phase of the Image is the absolute norm.
What we witness has little to do with the sport of football.
© 2024 Football is Fixed
