So, it's xenophobic break until the weekend. Following the success of my "Anybody But England" flags that were produced for the World Cup, it is time for another rant against the colonial imperialism that surfaces whenever the Three Lions stride onto an international battlefield.
OK, for a starter, out of the 28 players originally named in the England squad, 15 come from an Irish and/or Afro-Caribbean background. How galling it must be to have to put up with all that God Saving The Queen, Sweet Chariots Swinging Low(?), Jerusalem, Hope and Glory shite when plantations, famines, slavery, Cromwell and British divide and rule policies of yesteryear are considerably more defining in the lives of you and your family.
Fortunately, England will never win anything of consequence for three reasons. Firstly, they are simply not good enough. Secondly, wages are more important than nationalism for the Ras Clots and Eejits that choose England ahead of Jamaica or Eire. Thirdly, the bookmakers would never allow it. No chance. Also, England suffers from the same sort of regionalism that blights Spanish football - the Catalans hate the Basques, the Galicians hate everybody and everybody hates the Castillians.
Sport is a lens through which society is able to view itself. The current wave of xenophobic racism that is sweeping Britain and Europe had its foundation in the Netherlands (England's opponents on Wednesday) with Pim Fortuyn and Theo Van Gogh and all that nonsense. We expect behaviour from immigrants that we don't expect from ourselves. From Tebbit's Cricket Test to Gordon Brown and all that Magna Carta shit, we expect all and sundry to be so grateful for the grudging acceptance that we bestow upon them. Yet the English abroad live in tiny enclaves of ex-pats, refuse to learn the language, prefer chamber music to any local culture and complain about how cruel all these nasty Europeans are to animals.
Finally, I really don't believe in capital punishment but if there is a line where it might be valid, I wouldn't place the threshold at Saddam Hussein, Ariel Sharon, Bush, Blair or any of the other psychopaths that won't be missed when the world is eventually purged. But, it has to be worthy of consideration for the members of that bloody band that follows Engerland around playing offensive little ditties indicative of our little island mentality.
© Football Is Fixed/Dietrological
