Sam & Lee are comedians
On the telly the other night they were pretending to be in Athens for the Greece versus England UEFA Nations League game
They weren't in Athens.
They were in the UK in a studio being prompted on their guided vocal output
This has two impacts
Firstly, the commentary team are distracted by the duality of monitoring the action on the field of play on a selection of screens whilst also monitoring the "action" in the studio - this led to Lee telling us that "Athens is a tough place to go" before being swiftly corrected as to his simulated geographical location while Sam mistook one Black man hitting the post for another, got the wrong goalscorer of one of the goals and failed to see Pickford's key stop at 1-0
There was also a conveyor belt of carefully filtered information regarding England's potential position in their group as the match progressed - Sam & Lee weren't actually lying...
... they were just being economical with the truth
Very economical
And, secondly, there is no true narrative flow, just bookmaker prompted / agent cartel prompted / insider trading disinformation prompted claptrap
Everyone is a winner
Apart from you
The fan
Scott Murray in the Guardian Minute-By-Minute commentary from Athens wrote after 4 minutes: "England need to win this game if they're going to have a chance of finishing top the group. They need to match or better Greece's 2-1 scoreline also. With this in mind, on ITV, the commentating team of Sam Matterface and Lee Dixon have already mentioned the benched Harry Kane over 800 times"
England scored after seven minutes
Oh
And Scott Murray wasn't in Athens either
Football is fixed
What will Sam & Lee have in store for us today?
Can't wait
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